Thursday, August 30, 2007

Lessons From A Frozen Bananna

My hand hurts really bad all because of a frozen banana.. I am not ready to write the book, All I ever needed to know I learned from a frozen banana, but it is an experience that keeps on giving.

People who have the joy of stabbing themselves in the kitchen can't really tell about it without having to use a word we don't like our kids to use. Stupid! Stupid banana. Stupid knife. Stupid blender. Stupid smoothie. Stupid kitchen. Stupid hand. I would not have to tell the story except for the stupid bandage and stupid stitches that broke open again yesterday. I wish I would have jammed the knife somewhere that I could clothe comfortably.

In all my wisdom, here is my list of lessons, so far, from a frozen banana:

1. Don't freeze a banana with the peel
2. When you freeze a banana with the peel, thawing it doesn't fix the problem.
3. When you freeze a banana with the peel, there is no way to peel it.
4. A knife will not peel a frozen banana no matter how hard you bare down
5. A knife will not peel a frozen banana whether you cut toward your left hand or away from it.
6. Even though it won't work, at least cut your frozen banana away from your left hand.
7. Persistence may do more harm than good, at least in the world of frozen bananas.
8. Frozen bananas can complicate life.
9. My stupid hand hurts really bad, as I write this, because of a frozen banana.
10. Frozen bananas make my wife cry, when she drives me to urgent care for stitches.

I am thinking you can use Dino, frozen banana, or banana interchangeably any place on the above list. I know Yvette can. Anyways, be careful today, remember persistence is not always a virtue, and if you happen to stab yourself in the hand on the journey better figure out a way to turn it into a smile.

In Columbia today with movement makers. Hung out with Dustin, Neal, Chris, and the Midtown gang yesterday. The Cypress Project. Vision Carolina. I can see it from here.

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