Welcome?

A friend prompted me to search for Oregon signs. The old sign said something like, "Welcome to Oregon, unless you are from California." Since I spend a bunch of time in the church world it would be too easy for me to ask, "What does the welcome sign at your church say?" So, I am not.

Our default mode is to speak harshly about big picture stuff that is out of our control and probably not our responsibility. Maybe it would be like throwing a grenade at a safe distance. For example, I can get a chuckle out of a state border sign that according to Google Maps is 2,651 miles away from my front door. Yet when you read the story behind the sign there are perfectly good reasons people in Oregon might feel that way.

So, here is the bottom line. In my life today there is a great big welcome sign. Unfortunately there is a great big exception, or two, or three. The scary part? Most of the exceptions in my life I am totally blind to -- my nature is tribal. We all are that way I think, or most of us are. We love people who are just like us. We either pity (we confuse this with caring) or make fun of all the rest. So the challenge today is not to the state of Oregon. The challenge is to me first. Then I will toss a grenade your way. Don't worry if you don't need this. I did. Maybe you can toss it another direction if you didn't . . . 2,651 miles in another direction if you want . . .

White Knuckle Drunk - Observations from "The Swamp"

If you have any connection with the recovery community you probably have already heard the expression, "the white-knuckled drunk." I spent almost ten years in New Orleans deeply involved in the recovery community. I learned so much -- I need to put more of it in print.

I wondered, as I Twittered and Facebooked through "The Swamp" with my great friend Manley, if there was anyway I could connect sports with life. I understand that most of you don't quite have the "football love" that some of my friends and I do. BTW, for you, "The Swamp" is the home field of the Florida Gators. Florida's football success over the past four years may place them as the greatest college football team in history, or at least in the top five.

I went for friendship and the experience -- my team, the Tennessee Vols, were expected to be slaughtered by the powerful Gators. Long story short -- it did not happen as the whole world, including me, expected. The Gators won, but not by so much. But, unlike most Vol fans, I was not as inspired by the heart, courage, and resilience of my team. Don't get me wrong, those traits were all there and deserve a smattering of applause. I was proud.

The bottom line is to win. As optimistic fans we can always talk about being "on the verge," effort, and moral victories. I was there, I sat closer to the action than any other live college, pro, or high school game in my life. The Vols were much closer to being embarrassed like everyone predicted than winning. One more "no fumble" yard by Tim Tebow and the route would have been on. My team was battling way too hard not to come closer to win. The Vols will lose again this season. At least 5 more times -- probably more. Way too many white knuckles on the Big Orange sidelines. Way too many white knuckles on the field.

Now, the bridge -- My concern in The Swamp about my team, is my concern about me at times, and you. My team was working way too hard not to get better results. If there is not more than your best effort pushing you forward, although you may be coming close, you will collapse before you will ever win.

Hopefully, some personal application is coming to view for you here -- I want to think about it more before I try to be profound. I walked away more bothered than encouraged Saturday. But, the greater point -- I may be wrong about Vol football (I hope so) but I don't think I am wrong about life. My best effort alone at being smarter, better at relationships, more moral, more loving, less dysfunctional -- will only leave me with white knuckles and an eventual collapse. I need outside help. Let's talk more about that this week.